FOOD
Cooking the Christmas meal inevitably involves a lot of work, particularly if family members have strong food preferences. An increasingly number of young people in particular have become vegetarian or vegan. Others may be unable to eat meat or dairy due to medical issues or allergies. Not only does it mean extra work, it can trigger an argument and give a horrid parent a reason to complain that all the demands for different food is ruining her Christmas.
Our advice is to tell your horrid parent in advance what you, your partner or children won’t or can’t eat. Make it clear you don’t want to make more work for her and offer to bring a course yourself. If they see this as a rejection say you will equally be happy to have the same vegetables as the rest of the family as long as they as not cooked with the turkey or covered with gravy. Try to be positive about any food that you can eat.
If, however, you are hosting Christmas day for the family you can of course make your own plans and make both traditional dishes and special food for your guests with specific needs. Be aware that even if you are doing all the work your horrid parent may criticise you for accommodating everyone’s wishes. If this happens try to stay calm as Christmas is a time for kindness and making everyone feel welcome.
LAZY RELATIVES
When families gather there will always be those who will immediately offer to help and others who expect everything to be done for them. This is especially true over the Christmas meal, but there is no need for anyone to be a martyr. Or feel resentful that some of the family expect to be waited on.